Monday, December 04, 2006


Once Hollyoaks omibus was the staple diet of the single 20/30 something year old bloke on a sunday morning. Now this fairly middle of the road soap has a couple of interesting story lines. The peeping tom strand, the psycho wife strand, the baby strand and the hot babe working in the beauty salon strand. All incidentally involving some really fit babes strangely enough. Louise, Zoe, Claire and Becca. In no order of preference. Why else would a bloke be interested in Hollyoaks?

The Claire, Max and the money story line has certainly picked up pace where Claire has now emptied all the heart pills and hopes the gullible Max Cunningham will keel over leaving her with the insurance money. I can predict a few deaths along with way involving the Black Widow in waiting.

Becca facing jail for shagging a school boy is wondering who will look after the kid. Foster home love. Its the only way to go. I mean would anyone in their right mind ask Tony the analist or Jake the moron to raise a child? No. I predict that she'll go down and then lose the baby.

Zoe the student clearly too fit for Zack the scouse has clearly too much of the bottle blonde seeping into her head to realise that Mr Peeping Tom seems to all of a sudden like everything she likes and knows all the right things to say. Not a player, just a weirdo. Take me instead!! I predict an intense standoff at a bridge where Zoe is held captive by Mr Tom.

..and finally the luscious Louise who although dated Mr middle of the road bumbling copper seems to be pining for the dastardly Warren (too much coke and not enough vodka). This saga has dragged on for far too long and not enough footage of Louise. More please. Perhaps a lesbian affair with one of the McQueen sisters (apart from the ugly one) would spice things up. I predict a lesbian affair! :-)

Come to think of it, why was it fashionable to have lesbian affairs in all the major soaps one minute and then none the next?

More to the point, why aren't there more ethnic people in Hollyoaks. Why always the token black family? Eastenders is especially guilty of this crime. Of all the places in London I would have thought that a larger presence of ethnic minorities as central characters is in order.

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