Career move...more money...

Just typical of how things work out in life!!

Get a job that pays well and is quite fulfilling.

Decide that relationship doesn't work. Partner moves out. Extra money coming in goes to the bills she used to pay. Sh*t!

Whilst having a conversation with a few select friends of mine a while back in anticipation of this happening; several money making schemes came into suggestion:

1) Get a lodger. Yes a nice and easy option that I would raise an eyebrow to in recognition of its simplicity, but no. Did that once before. Now don't get me wrong, lodgers are a great way of harbouring tax evaders, murderers, assassins, illegal immigrants (am I allowed to say that with getting arrested by the P.C. police), transexual prostitutes, CSA fugitives. I experienced one of the suggested lodgers a long time ago. A really nice chap, popular with the people he worked with although usually sloshed by the end of the night (he worked at a bar). The dodgy geezer evading all sorts of things. None of my business though as all I was interested in was the money to keep my head above water. I am a reformed smoker so I cannot possible criticise someone elses smoking habits. I usually have a smoke mid to late afternoon and possibly not until the evening with a pint in my hand to accompany it. This chap however was a morning mid morning, mid mid morning, early afternoon, early mid afternoon....you get my point. There is nothing worse that smell stale cigarette smoke first thing in the morning. Another thing, the bastard left cigarette holes in my carpet. He was a good cook though and part of the inticement for accepting him as a lodger was his latest games console. Please note, this was a part of my life where batchelorism was the book by my bedside.
So to summarise; I had a lodger who brought along a games console, who could cook, reasonable at keeping the place tidy, smoked all day long, left fag burns on the carpet and sofas, brought rather dodgy characters back to the yard at stupid o'clock in the morning (all smokers of course), tried to get me to help him dodge people he owed money to. So, no. I wouldn't do it again unless the lodger turned out to be a gorgeous she with several gorgeous mates (single of course).

2) Male Escort. A friend of mine who has a rather good job as a chef (not sure if he's any good though) suggested to me sometime ago that he had a second job on weekends to help pay for the bills. Of course I thought it quite the sensible thing to do. I personally worship every free day given to me as I am quite disorganised with domestic type things. I digress.
One afternoon he decided to drop me a line. Clearly the kind of afternoon I needed to get on with things at work. Then he dropped the mother of all bombshells. He came straight out with it. He provides a male escort service. Never in a million years had I thought he'd go for something like that. Sometime time had passed during our brief conversation I realised that he would probably make a good one (so all you female readers interested, I have now become his agent). Months later, I spotted him in the local watering hole talking to a group of people. I of course said hello and sat down. My friend is not always known for being discreet about other peoples affairs some of the time so it came as no suprise that he would not be so with his own. This is where I found some of the more unsavory details of the job. I mean, really. How ugly must a woman be to take viagra, ecstasy and coke to keep going like a train? He did mention four hundred quid for the night though............nope. Not for me.

3) IT contracting. The most seductive of the other two. There is a lot of money to be made in this field. I happen to have a permanent position in my employment. I have friends however who make a mint at £50 - £100 per hour. Yes per hour. Per hour. Per hour. Wow. Then I took a look at some of the finer points of contracting. Loadsa money yes. Managing your accounts, don't think that has been a past time of mine. Job security ? Not really. Taking a job is usually driven by the desire to earn more money and not so much about the desire to grow into specialised areas. I personally like my job and what it allows me to do for my personal ambitions. This is by no means critising my good friends who do this kind of work. They have a wealth of experience in all areas of IT and there is one in particular who I think will go a long way. His name is Kumar (not real name for the purpose of this blog). You may have heard of this name in a previous entry.

4) Drug dealing. (Yes real suggestions made to me by 'friends'). No. Damn it! Didn't anyone remember what happened to Zammo (Grange Hill)!

5) Cutting down. Possibly the most simple way of saving money. Booze, fags, and takeaway's. Well actually less of the takeaway's, more like posh homemade food like steaks with red wine and onion sauce or stilton sauce etc, indian curries, pizza, jamaican goat curry, jerk chicken, something from the Jamie Oliver cookbook, italian, turkish, thai, roasts etc. All of these are homemade. No messing around. I prefer to cook at home from raw ingredients. None of that crappy ready made sauces or bases. Those are for wimps. Interestingly as I glance at the text while typing I find that the foods listed above are very much like the takeaways I get anyway. I must admit I have always strived to home cook anything that I have experienced at a restaurant or takeaway. I like the idea of being able to do it at home. It gives me a great sense of satisfaction when I serve those dishes up for friends and family.

Anyway the point of the detailed description is that it all becomes very expensive for one person. Roll on beans on toast!

Did I mention booze and fags. Yes indeed the staple diet of the batchelor along with kebabs. When I said cut down I meant it too. Those two are subject to a 2Darts cutdown. I'm certainly not getting any younger and that haunting advert of the guy who's only 36 with lung cancer gasping away. I'm not too far away from that age either. Booze. There comes a time in the year when the sun is out, the weather is wonderful, people out showing more flesh than at any other time except in the confines of there home or gym (what's that?). Time to dig out that old T-shirt. Yes that one were you look cool and rather flash. Oh dear. That one year of boozing has taken its toll. No more six pack, not even four. A one pack. Oh dear. Worse still that bump of a stomach is before the first meal of the day!