Scientology

Waking up to a pretty miserable day duly assisted by a slight hangover I read an interesting article on the BBC news website about a slanging match between a journalist and a hardcore Scientologist (crack pot). A video clip posted on YouTube showing a full on barny between the two people has raised questions again about what this cult, erm no sorry I mean't religion is all about. There are stories of people disassociating themselves with their families and friends etc to follow this cult, erm no sorry I mean't religion. Am I worried about being hunted down or followed everywhere I go? No. There are plenty of other nutters that follow me around every day. I'm used to it.

So as curious as ever I decided to look up the Scientology site for that elusive video clip. The BBC didn't have a direct link to the clip and armed with a hangover I couldn't be bothered to search for it. On the site was a link to a free personality test. Presumably this is to see whether I am suitable to become a member of this cult, erm no sorry I mean't religion. I'm not a stupid person so when faced with the usual "who are you" and "what do you do" stuff, I clearly falsified that information. The name being a Mr P.I. Staker and I'm a pig farmer in Azerbaijan.

The usual instrusive questioning ensues and after close to 200 profiling questions, which incidentally I answered honestly, I came to the final part, to which I was told that a scientology scientist would analyse my input and send me the results. Word of warning to anyone who wishes to take part in this test. 1) False details are a must if you are not serious but just curious. 2) Azerbaijan clearly doesn't have a local Scientology office. The nearest one is in Belarus. 3) Don't forget to put a real email address in, preferably not containing your real name in the address.

I clearly didn't bother to give my email address. So some pig farmer in Azerbaijan will be harrassed by those people from the cult. I mean religion. They preferred it if I called it a religion.

.....okay, I have found the video clip. Here is the clip of John Sweeny apparently losing the plot. I don't think so.

.....and here is a clip of a man called Tommy from the scientology cult, erm I mean religion being a little upset. Coincidentally, he does rather look like Tom Cruise. Weird(o).

A final couple of things to note. Why would this test normally cost $500+?

Are people really willing to pay $100,000+ to find out the secrets of this cult erm religion? Religion.

The BBC Panorama programme is out on Monday 14th May at 8.30pm. Don't miss it.

Next week we'll be talking on the subject of, "Are brain washing cults back in fashion again?".